Afflictions!

There are many kinds of afflictions!

There are afflictions of the body! These number so high I can’t even begin to count how many there are! There is also afflictions of the mind! Many today suffer from mental disease more than ever! What we eat and drink, the air we breath affects us more now than ever before! The air we breathe is polluted and the food is now filled with chemicals! Nothing is safe. They try to convince us by eating organics we would be more healthy but in reality that is bullshit. They bottle water, probably tap water, truth be known and charge outrageous prices for it! The Drs prescribe medicine that has numerous side effects to try and balance you but truth be known most likely it will kill you faster than your diseases!

I’m Bipolar Schizophrenic! I have my ups and downs sometimes i hear voices. I’m paranoid and often violent! I pray daily for relief but get the answer that was given Paul when he prayed to the Father to remove his thorn! I’ve finally accepted my fate and I’ll continue to do His will no matter what happens to me. I’m functional I guess but sometimes it gets me down. I can’t have a wife because I’m emotionally out of control! I’ve never hit a woman or a child but men cause something inside me to boil! I’ve had two men in my life who could take me in small doses but stayed by me! I’m 58 yrs old and I’m getting worse! I’m losing touch with others, I’ve isolated myself from most everyone because I say things to hurt others without meaning to and when I do I become very sad and angry with myself and I do a lot of crying over all those I have hurt! I’m very smart I have a very high iq. I learn things very fast if I’m interested in it! I’m not without common sense and i find most people hard to be around because conversation is very limited with them! I’m not saying I’m better than anyone, I’m Not! Actually most people are better off than me because they can go to sleep and their minds do have a shut off point where mine doesn’t!

I won’t take meds anymore because the meds hinder my mind to a point where i can barely think and cause a zombie effect! I’ve had so many Counselors and Psychiatrist that I’ve lost count, everyone of them telling me for years things are going to get better! Not going to happen! I gave up on that happening. I’ve taken every med you could imagine some work for short periods of time but always I had to keep changing them, a few nearly killed me! I’m tired, I’m just waiting for my Father to take me from this insane roller coaster ride in this hell I’m in. He sometimes sends the angels or the Holy Spirit to comfort me when I’m ready to end this misery, they come and get me through it then leave!

This virus has made matters worse now, i can’t even talk to anyone anymore and my friends finally got fed up with my out of control emotions and the fact I never shut up! I love the Father so much, He became my everything and I wanted to tell everyone about Him! They didn’t want to hear about that they wanted me as I once was smoking pot and getting drunk. I can’t be Toby anymore! I’m Tobias now! Toby died and became a child of God! No more Toby the devil worshiper!

One day the Father will take me from this insane world so my mind will finally be at peace and i will be with Him and with Yahusha forever and I will know peace of mind once and for all! Just pray I don’t go psycho and end it myself! I want to go home!

For you out there who have these mental afflictions I wrote this because i know most don’t understand you but know there are others like us and I know your pain. Just remember there is a way out we just have to wait on the Father to take us out of Here! Know to, that I love you all and I wish I could take your pain on me!

Published by Tobias

I'm a Child of Yahuah I'm spreading the gospels of Yahusha. Yahuah is the true name of God and His Sons name is Yahusha. The true Savior !!

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